25 August 2010

Joys and Frustrations

I foraged sloes at Attenborough. In the freezer they go for the making of my first sloe gin. My mum has requested it for Christmas, but I guess I need more sloes first! They take a lot of collecting! Recipes welcomed, though...

New red hair. The sour note here though is that the henna did not take at all this time - so my new red is a chemical red. The internal debate was long, but after two attempts to henna I had just invested too much energy in the new bright hair to decide to forget it all. I love the colour, but I am torn with regretting allowing chemicals back into my home in the name of vanity.

There are many compromises this week, after no compromise at all over Jenna's birthday and all the home-made-ness and the no-plastic-ness.

Another compromise has been the one day of flea spray use. That cat has been treated regularly with (nasty chemically) spot-on flea treatment, because this neighbourhood is full of cats and they are often not well cared for. The flea treatment compromise was almost enough for me to say I never want to own a pet again (though I don't know if I really will ever be able to say that) and THEN she bought fleas home anyway! One day last week she started scratching (a week after her last spot-on stuff) and I immediately flea sprayed everything. Feeling guilty, but doing it anyway with the residual mama-anger at the health visitor implying that my children and house weren't cared for. *sigh*

Well, it didn't work. So we are now on the routine of hoovering everything, salting, hoovering again, peppermint and neem oil (when the latter arrives from good old ebay!), hoovering, vinegar spray... I am not a happy mama.

I have been feeling so inspired to create some art, though. This is a very happy feeling. I have been impatient, in a good way, ready to start something new and grow in a different direction... It isn't comfortable, but it is happier, and I am seeing it as a good thing - an important time - a time to become more fully me. :)

Add to the pile of ridiculous stuff, though, tha darn car journeys to and from Attenborough, farm shop, Emma's house, church. We can't bus to those places, but oh how much I am hating the car right now. Rowan is a little houdini and can get out of her car retraints (even though we upgraded to the super-expensive highly rated rear-facing upright five-point-harness type of seat) and when she isn't escaping she is crying.

Cue the stop-start game: Find lay-by. Offer breast. Nope, she wants to climb not feed. Eventually put baby back in seat. Baby cries LOUDER. Find somewhere to stop. Offer breast again...

It ends up being a desperate game of driving as far as nerves, principles, and focus will allow before stopping again with a car full of people who increasingly as as unhappy stopped as they are on the move. I don't have an answer. Apart from to avoid such journeys as much as possible (which may or may not then involve having a supermarket delivery instead of using the farm shop, which again I'm not happy with)!

I am rising above it all. I have happy healthy children, a house that is finally feeling like it's under my control (because I am so done with hating where I am right now). I have music, green growing things, crafting and love. I am an artist. And I have red hair. So, take that, world.

9 comments:

  1. Ack, don't worry about the compromises, we all make them sometimes, so long as you're happy. No advice on the car journeys, distractions obviously don't work, hope it just settles down some day soon to reduce the stress.

    Love the red, I haven't done mine red for years but always liked a deep red.

    I am going to pop the Sloe recipes I use on my blog soon, as picking season has started already, here's what I use.
    http://www.cottagesmallholder.com/two-recipes-wild-damson-gin-and-sloe-gin-37 - is the recipe I now prefer to use for sloe gin (except I vary the sugar sometimes, and often use caster sugar), I like the almond essence in it. I always freeze sloes to avoid waiting for non-existent frosts and they then split rather than needing pricked.

    And then, when drained, use the fruit to make truffles - a bonus extra gift for the adults at Christmas - http://www.sloe.biz/pip/viewtopic.php?t=171 (again, I've played with this recipe a bit, but the basic recipe is good truffles, can use different chocolate though, and different creams if necessary).

    Or just stoned fruit and melted chocolate in ice cube trays for delicious chocolates.

    Have fun xx

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  2. The red hair is just lovely! As for compromises that's life eh? We make them all the time at this end, including the dreaded but much needed on line supermarket delivery. Cut corners where you can and save your sanity, your kids have such a lovely life. If you can send some happy vibes my way, am in serious need of them!
    Love and hugs San x

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  3. Love the hair, and I have to say, my darling, love the attitude too! :-)

    Sigh, I do miss having red or purple hair... and at the moment I'm in that horrid stage where there's blocks of grey and then the dyed blond bits, bleugh.. almost enough to have me reach for the purple.. but I've come this far, I shall perserve. :-)

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  4. OOoooh LOVE the red hair! gorgeous x

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  5. It's a beautiful red.

    I don't know if they are any better but I do remember seeing some "Environmentally Friendly-er" permanent hair dyes in one of our local health food shops.

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  6. Compromise is what it's all about. I figure I still do way more than the average American so when I do have to compromise it's not nearly as bad as what some people do every day. (Or is that just making excuses for myself?!) And as for fleas, we did the no flea spray route and it took almost a year to be flea free, ugh. I'd rather compromise and get rid of the damn things!!

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  7. I think your hair looks lovely :)

    Re the car seat, have you tried looking at the new style ones which have an impact shield rather than a harness? The Kiddy Infinity Pro is the one that I have and seems to be impossible to escape, but also has the curious benefit of feeling less restrained for little ones as their shoulders aren't pinned back like in a 5-point harness. There is a video online somewhere of how this works but I can't find it now. You can see the general idea by looking at videos of it though. You can also get a little aquadraw-type thing which clips onto it which I thought was a fantastic idea.

    I only suggest this as I believe that some sellers of the rear facing seats will take returns if it's a few days after the sale if the seat is not suitable for your car/child, it's a lot of money otherwise. If you have the option to return the first seat, definitely have a look though.

    foreversomeday

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  8. We had this car seat for Morgan, to keep her rear facing, and it's the only rear facing seat I have ever seen that will cope with the short lengths of the straps in our car (it also can use only a lap belt to secure it in rear-facing mode). There is no way we can replace it, but strapping her in really is making journeys hellish. :S

    She traveled yesterday without protest though. Thankfully I think distraction + food in car + loud music might be the way to go...

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Penny for your thoughts? :)