I foraged sloes at Attenborough. In the freezer they go for the making of my first sloe gin. My mum has requested it for Christmas, but I guess I need more sloes first! They take a lot of collecting! Recipes welcomed, though...
New red hair. The sour note here though is that the henna did not take at all this time - so my new red is a chemical red. The internal debate was long, but after two attempts to henna I had just invested too much energy in the new bright hair to decide to forget it all. I love the colour, but I am torn with regretting allowing chemicals back into my home in the name of vanity.
There are many compromises this week, after no compromise at all over Jenna's birthday and all the home-made-ness and the no-plastic-ness.
Another compromise has been the one day of flea spray use. That cat has been treated regularly with (nasty chemically) spot-on flea treatment, because this neighbourhood is full of cats and they are often not well cared for. The flea treatment compromise was almost enough for me to say I never want to own a pet again (though I don't know if I really will ever be able to say that) and THEN she bought fleas home anyway! One day last week she started scratching (a week after her last spot-on stuff) and I immediately flea sprayed everything. Feeling guilty, but doing it anyway with the residual mama-anger at the health visitor implying that my children and house weren't cared for. *sigh*
Well, it didn't work. So we are now on the routine of hoovering everything, salting, hoovering again, peppermint and neem oil (when the latter arrives from good old ebay!), hoovering, vinegar spray... I am not a happy mama.
I have been feeling so inspired to create some art, though. This is a very happy feeling. I have been impatient, in a good way, ready to start something new and grow in a different direction... It isn't comfortable, but it is happier, and I am seeing it as a good thing - an important time - a time to become more fully me. :)
Add to the pile of ridiculous stuff, though, tha darn car journeys to and from Attenborough, farm shop, Emma's house, church. We can't bus to those places, but oh how much I am hating the car right now. Rowan is a little houdini and can get out of her car retraints (even though we upgraded to the super-expensive highly rated rear-facing upright five-point-harness type of seat) and when she isn't escaping she is crying.
Cue the stop-start game: Find lay-by. Offer breast. Nope, she wants to climb not feed. Eventually put baby back in seat. Baby cries LOUDER. Find somewhere to stop. Offer breast again...
It ends up being a desperate game of driving as far as nerves, principles, and focus will allow before stopping again with a car full of people who increasingly as as unhappy stopped as they are on the move. I don't have an answer. Apart from to avoid such journeys as much as possible (which may or may not then involve having a supermarket delivery instead of using the farm shop, which again I'm not happy with)!
I am rising above it all. I have happy healthy children, a house that is finally feeling like it's under my control (because I am so done with hating where I am right now). I have music, green growing things, crafting and love. I am an artist. And I have red hair. So, take that, world.