Doing good, feeling good

This week of sleep is getting better and better. I've had anything up to six hours a night so can this finally be our return to one-or-none night feeding? I'm still utterly unable to tell if it's linked to food or not but she does seem to be eating more again. I suppose this is a good juncture to talk about baby led weaning again and how well that has gone for us.

Food is just not even a thought for us most of the time. We go out, we eat in restaurants, she eats what we eat and when we eat and we don't think about baby portions or mashing or spoon feeding her or anything. She has made her own intruduction to food at her own rate and has always eaten adult foods. I can't describe how liberating it is to just feed a baby off my own plate from the start. It seems so obvious now.

The only way in which we revert to the way I did things before is to give Morgan apple puree - as a dessert - because it's yummy and because I eat it rather than any other reason! We also buy some expensive but lovely biodynamically grown rhubarb and apple pots, because I can't help myself and they're less naughty than chocolate. :)

I'm sometimes feeling a bit overwhelmed still, and at those times I think the nagging feeling that I'm pregnant is total paranoia and a symptom of feeling like I'm not really coping with these two. But then other days (or hours) it's amazing and there's no conflict and we resolve our differences of opinion calmly and democratically, and I love having children... And those times I think it's wishful thinking and I'm just subconciously hoping that I'm pregnant. But the feeling won't go away, and it's way to early to know and I have absolutely not a trace of suspicious symptoms and we have been really careful in spite of a chart that's all over the place.

Martin sent a lovely text earlier that went a long way to soothing my nerves. I told him that I'm sick of getting funny looks for Morgan screaming the whole time she's in the sling because she wants to wander off. He said, "What do they know - you're a great mother. I'm proud of you."