10 December 2011

Tenth Full Moon

And here we still are! Well I suppose that's about right for me. Baby arriving tonight would *still* be my earliest by a few days, though in some ways this year has flown by in other ways I feel like I have been pregnant forever. Certainly I have never been in so much pain for so long at the end of pregnancy: it adds a certain something to the looking-forwards-to-baby.

Minnow is such a lovely round teeny bump, all baby, and all kinds of weird shapes as the little wriggler stretched and rolls around inside of me. Rowan comes and kisses my bump several times a day and says, "Good baby. Lovely baby. Get born, baby." Sometimes she adds the more selfish, "And bring my milk back!" Ha!

We are all a little bit on edge to tell the truth. I am so sick of my random crying fits, and so sick of worrying about how much longer I may have to wait with Christmas approaching and Morgan's birthday just tomorrow, with three other children who need me and currently barely able to walk to the end of the road, with all this "other stuff" - still. I am struggling to see the baby at the end of it all, struggling to remember why I was willing to go through pregnancy again. I am so done with it, so very finished with pregnancy.

Baby is clearly happy and comfortable. So we wait you out, little one, trusting that you know when it is your time. But, for the record, I have no objections to tonight...

6 comments:

  1. I remember waking up every morning and *still* being pregnant with Georgia and I would burst into tears. Every day felt like a lifetime.

    I hope tonight is the night.

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  2. With everything else going on, and being in pain, which can be all consuming in itself. But recognising this, I reckon, is the first step to baby coming.

    It will soon be so very different, and you will forget all this angst, pain, and impatience.

    (((hugs)))

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  3. Is you tree up? Everytime I think of you giving birth, I see a tree all sparkly..

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  4. Today has been so beautiful and peaceful, really Morgan's serene spirit in everything we did. :) I feel so much calmer and ready to just wait - just live in what is rather than all the maybes. Minnow will come when cooked! :)

    Tree went up ages ago Joxy, it has to be up for Morgan every year because I gave birth to her under the lights five years ago. :) :)

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  5. Just catching up here, and oh how I know it. My 3 babies were late, well, medically if you know what I mean, I am sure they were perfectly on time for themselves. I still remember being awake half the night so uncomfortable and unable to sleep but so tired I couldn't put the time to good use, so just lay in the dark, wishing the baby would come. Anyway, just wanted to sympathize, and say 'cmon baby, mama wants to meet you' lol.
    V
    xxx

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Penny for your thoughts? :)