30 January 2008

No sleep but lots of sibling love

Morgan's sleep has suddenly dipped, and she is waking for an hour then sleeping for an hour - all night long. I'm feeling really ragged and conflicted, and talking a lot about what I could do to fix it although I know deep down it is just part of her journey to interdependacy. I can't stop feeling like I must have caused it by meeting her need to co-sleep. But when I tried to change that pattern and have her sleep in her own room her sleep got worse, so unless I'm converting to sleep training there is no way out. The bottom line seems to be, this is her need. Do I meet it at cost to myself, or do I ignore it at cost to her?

She and Jenna are sharing and playing so sweetly together all the time at the moment. They do have little spats, mostly Jenna being too rough when she tickles or hugs. Sometimes Morgan lashing out with a hand when she doesn't want to play any more or when Jenna tries to take something from her. But they are so affectionate to each other I feel really left out! When things get heated and I separate them to play with different toys and get some space from each other they both seem to take it as a punishment. They sit opposite sides of the room or other sides of the baby gate and cry for each other.

Jenna went for a walk with my mum today and Morgan was really unhappy to be left behind. She cried at the door for a while, calling for "Jaya" and banging. After a while she would let me feed her and we had a cuddle but she just kept pointing at the door and saying her sister's name. She points a lot to say what she wants, it's fabulously funny. When she wants to ask permission to have something she points at the object and then to herself.

She wanted Martin's sandwich the other day and her little hand went, sandwich-Morgan, sandwich-Morgan, MORGAN. Her face just said pleeeeeeease!

When we finally left the room today to go to the bathroom she marched right on into Jenna's bedroom and pulled back the covers. Perhaps she hoped that Jenna was only upstairs taking a nap? Anyway after that she knew that her sister wasn't in the house so she just brought me the sling and gestured to the door until Jen got back.

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