29 August 2012

Brick and Museums and finding Steady Ground

Feel free to read between the lines (or lack thereof) as to how rapidly things are improving for me right now. I want to think I'm getting there, that I'm not sinking.  And I am having more light(er) moments.  I am concentrating for longer, and finding pleasure in simple things again.  But on the other hand I am struggling more with overwhelming panic and those "not good enough" self-accusations.
DSC08177

Anyway.  Isn't it such a blessing that the camera captures the beautiful for me, and not the darkness?  :)
DSC08158

Jenna totally rocks the vintage dress Em chose for her birthday.
DSC08153

We took friends to the Museum of Childhood.  It was a good day.
DSC08164

Jenna spent every penny of her money in the gift shop buying a present for Jeremy.  He spent his pocket money buying a bubble wand for her.  Generous little people!  It was one of those enchanted days where siblings suddenly offer to share and hug each other spontaneously, where all the things that might go wrong just don't, and the sun shines after all.
DSC08162

DSC08173

It's hard to keep posting, keep connected, keep sharing, when I don't feel great.  Then when I do, I find it helps; orders things for me and reminds me how many good things we *did* find this week.
DSC08176

The baby beaming at every new discovery, and every rediscovery of such things as the feeling of sticky juice on her hands or the joy of peekaboo or the taste of dirt.  Bright green prickles from chestnut trees.  Home made biscuit bars.  The sound of rain on glass.  Hot tea in a flask.  A new Brambly Hedge DVD.  The smell of damp wool drying over the kitchen door.  Rose petals falling everywhere.

4 comments:

  1. I find that when i post it also helps. It gives me a way off looking back when i feel i am not "doing enough" and i can see i do ok! I hope that's what you get from your blogging. I know i come here and feel a joy at the things your children are experiencing and i look forward to little views in to your home and family. Thank you for sharing xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. :) Thank you! It really does give me a glowy feeling to hear that. xx

      Delete
  2. I agree with Pip, as hard as it is for you at times, there is something so comforting about seeing your little poppets growing and stretching in every way. Helped of course by frank discussion and lots of knitting lol. Glad you are feeling a bit of a shift.
    V
    xxx

    ReplyDelete
  3. love to you, love your pics and words, keep posting xoxoxoxox

    ReplyDelete

Penny for your thoughts? :)